Texas April 2009
Our Expectations (E) can be set by many things, good and bad. Perhaps it is our expectations for our own performance or perfectionism, our family’s expectations of us, the expectations of our culture or our jobs, or of what is best for ourselves, our families, friends, and nation. Some of these expectations are up to you, and some are not. Some are reasonable, and some are not.
R= Reality. This differs significantly from our expectations in many ways, good and bad. Some of this reality is up to you—influenced by your own personal choices and decisions. Some is not.
The difference= a. What is a? This depends on you.
a= anxiety about the unknown.
= anger about dashed hopes or things working out differently than your plan.
= acceptance of things that are out of your control
= accusation when your values and decisions are not popular
= adjustment when you choose to make the best of what you have
= apologies when you make poor choices
= avoidance of the things that keep you at your best or worst.
a= …
So how do we determine a? That part is up to you. Perhaps it is allowing ourselves to develop community that helps us see when our a is negative. Perhaps it is taking the time to forge out our values and beliefs. Perhaps it is listening to people who are completely different than us, and evaluating our own priorities. Regardless, today our a is acceptance, and we are making plans to deal with the unexpected news in the best way possible.
